Sunday, September 9, 2012

"Mothers Matter. Fathers Matter."

Here's a juxtaposition of excerpts from two articles.  Both point up the importance of fathers, and by implication, mothers, too. Each sex brings special gifts to a child that can never be replaced by a second adult (I will not say parent) of the same-sex, living in the household.

The first is from a widely-reproduced recent article by Robert Oscar Lopez called "Growing Up With Two Moms: The Untold Childrens View":

"My peers learned all the unwritten rules of decorum and body language in their homes; they understood what was appropriate to say in certain settings and what wasn’t; they learned both traditionally masculine and traditionally feminine social mechanisms.

Even if my peers’ parents were divorced, and many of them were, they still grew up seeing male and female social models. They learned, typically, how to be bold and unflinching from male figures and how to write thank-you cards and be sensitive from female figures....

I had no male figure at all to follow, and my mother and her partner were both unlike traditional fathers or traditional mothers. As a result, I had very few recognizable social cues to offer potential male or female friends, since I was neither confident nor sensitive to others. Thus I befriended people rarely and alienated others easily. Gay people who grew up in straight parents’ households may have struggled with their sexual orientation; but when it came to the vast social universe of adaptations not dealing with sexuality—how to act, how to speak, how to behave—they had the advantage of learning at home. Many gays don’t realize what a blessing it was to be reared in a traditional home."

Emphasis added. I think that statement is probably true of many people of any sort reared in a traditional home. 

The second is by a lady named Rebecca Hamilton, writing on the website "Public Catholic":

"My Daddy was what pundits condescendingly refer to as 'blue collar' or 'working class.' What that means is that he was a highly skilled person who could pull an engine out of a car, take it apart, rebuild it like new, put it back in the car, test drive the car to see if all was right and still be home in time for eight hours sleep before he had to get up for work the next day.

The men I grew up around never worried about being man enough. The very notion of worrying about a thing like that was as foreign to them as worrying about being American or Oklahoman enough....

Daddy was teaching more than how to ride and care for a horse, more even than not to steal. He was teaching me a whole set of values. He was also, though neither of us was aware of it, teaching me about men. There wasn’t a plan in this. I feel confident that my daddy never read a single book on how to raise kids. He didn’t make dates to 'have a talk' with me or attempt to manipulate me. He just talked to me as part of our daily interactions."

This deliberate refusal to acknowledge the different and non-exchangable roles of men and women, mothers and fathers, may be the most disastrous consequence of the attempted redefinition of marriage. The question is explored by our new Archbishop, Salvatore Cordileone (and others) in the "Mothers Matter. Fathers Matter" segment of the "Marriage Matters to Kids" video:


The full "Marriage Matters to Kids" video may be seen here.

Posted by Gibbons J. Cooney

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